The Ballad of Innis McNubbin
Occasionally I discover a few bizarre (that may not be a strong enough word) song lyrics floating around in my head and this morning I found myself singing an Irish ballad about the new puppy my wife and I brought home a couple weeks back.
“Innis,” as we named him, means “island,” or “isle” in Gaelic, and since my wife and I both have Irish/Scottish lineage, and because we live on an island in the Florida Keys, we figured the name Innis, the “Irish island dog,” would be a fitting title- even though he is an Australian Shepherd.
When we went to pick up Innis outside of Orlando (he was actually born in Apopka, Florida), one of the first things we noticed was that he didn’t have a tail. Apparently it is common practice to cut the tails off of Australian Shepherd puppies (I’m not sure why).
“McNubbin,” is a combination of my wife’s maiden name (McNulty) and the fact that he has but a nub for a tail- a joking last name of course.
The following Irish ballad parody (or whatever you want to call it), tells the story of Innis McNubbin and the need for Australian Shepherds to have daily jobs or tasks to satisfy their natural instincts to work and to herd.
Lucy is our friend’s dog (who was rescued from a pound in Fort Lauderdale) whom Innis seems to be in love with and tries to “mount” every time he sees her, despite the fact that she’s been spayed.
The Ballad of Innis McNubbin
Oh my name it is Innis McNubbin; I’m a sheep herder by trade.
I have come from the land of Apopka, where the Aussie pups were made.
I have traveled the southeast shoreline; to the Keys I did set sail.
On a search for the filthy vandal, who lopped off most my tail.
I live with two evil guardians, who at night lock me away.
In a crate inside the bedroom, is where I’m forced to lay.
I can’t wait until I am older, when much bigger I shall be.
I will herd them into cages, just as they did to me.
Oh my name it is Innis McNubbin; I’m a philanderer by trade.
I will chase after your women, even after they’ve been spayed.
I’m in love with the fair maid Lucy; she is a part skipper key.
Imprisoned on the mainland, from the pound she was set free.
I did try and follow after her, but my legs they would not keep up.
For I’ve eaten many Frosty Paws®, and I am a chubby pup.
I can’t wait until I am older, when much faster I shall be.
I will herd her into my bedroom, where she cannot run from me.
Oh my name it is Innis McNubbin; I’m a gardener by trade.
I will dig up all your flowers, and then bark in a tirade.
Through the day I gather palm frawns, and then bring them all inside,
Where I spend most of my evenings, chewing on some old rawhide.
I will pee on all your flooring, and will poop where I do choose,
I will chew on all your couches, and run off with all your shoes.
I can’t wait until I am older, when my parents will finally see,
That I am the alpha dominant, and this house belongs to me.
Ol’ Innis McNubbin has an interesting tale (as opposed to tail) to tell. It looks like he’s getting quite large, so all the lovely ladies had better watch out! Great pictures of him. Love his coloring.